A birthday video works when the people in it have something real to say, so the plan changes with age. A child's birthday is grandparents and cousins saying they miss them. A 40th is friends from every chapter of a life who have never met each other. A 70th is three generations. The steps below are the same for all of them; the people and the questions are not.
Who to ask, and what to ask, by age
| Birthday | Who usually organises | Who to ask | A question that works |
|---|---|---|---|
| A child's birthday | A parent | Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins far away | What do you love doing with them? |
| 18th or 21st | A parent | Grandparents, teachers, coaches, family friends | One piece of advice for what comes next |
| 30th | A partner or best friend | Friends from school, college and work | The story only you could tell about them |
| 40th or 50th | A partner | Friends from every chapter, family, coworkers | What were they like when you first met them? |
| 60th or 65th | A partner or adult child | Family, old friends, coworkers | What do you wish for them in the next part of life? |
| 70th and over | Adult children | Children, grandchildren, siblings, old friends | What did they teach you? (the full guide for a 70th or 80th) |
1. Pick two or three questions
"Say happy birthday" gets thirty versions of the same sentence. A specific question gets stories, and when everyone answers the same one, the edit can put their answers side by side. Good questions for any age:
- What is the one thing they always say?
- Your favorite memory with them.
- What were they like when you first met them?
- What do you wish for them this year?
2. Make the list
Around 15 to 30 people makes the best film; for a child, 8 to 15 relatives is plenty. Go wider than the obvious names: the friend who moved away, the grandparent who will need help, the old roommate. Ask one person from each group (work, school, family) to help you find contacts. Invite a few more than you need, because some people will not send anything.
3. Send the invite and two reminders
Send it privately, by email or text, so the birthday person does not see it. Recording should take a minute: a link that opens the camera on their phone, no app and no account. A message you can copy:
Remind people twice: once halfway and once two days before the deadline. "15 of 22 have sent theirs" gets more replies than "don't forget".
4. A two-to-three-week plan
| When | What to do |
|---|---|
| 2 to 3 weeks before | Questions, list, invites. |
| 10 days before | First reminder. |
| 8 days before | Second reminder, and personal messages to the people who matter most. |
| 7 days before | Recording closes. Edit. |
| The day before | Watch it through on the screen you will use. |
Want a printed book of the messages as well? Close recording about two weeks out: our books print in 4 to 5 business days after you approve the proof, then take 2 to 5 days in the mail.
5. Edit it into a story
- Group by question, not by the order clips arrived.
- Funny first, warm last. End with the people closest to them.
- Trim every clip to its best line. Most messages have one.
- Keep it to 3 to 8 minutes for a party, and keep every full message for them to watch later.
You can do this yourself with a phone and a free editing app; for 20 or more people, set aside an evening or two. Or let us collect, remind and edit. A person checks every film before you see it.
6. Play it at the party
- Use a TV with real speakers, and turn on captions in a noisy room.
- Film their face while they watch.
- Send the film to everyone who recorded afterwards.
Common questions
How do I make a birthday video with messages from friends and family?
Pick two or three questions, send everyone a link where they can record on their phone, give them a deadline about a week before the birthday with two reminders, then edit the messages into one short film grouped by question and play it at the party.
How many people should be in a birthday video?
Around 15 to 30 people makes the best film. For a child's birthday, 8 to 15 relatives is plenty. Invite a few more than you need, because some people will not send anything.
How far ahead should I start a surprise birthday video?
Two to three weeks before the birthday. People need 7 to 10 days to record with reminders, and you need a few days to edit. Allow about two more weeks if you want a printed book.
How long should a birthday video be?
3 to 8 minutes for a party, depending on how many people are in it. Keep every full message so the birthday person can watch them all later.
Can I make a birthday video without an app?
Yes. You can collect clips by text or a shared folder and edit them in your phone's video editor, or use a service where people record in their phone's browser from a link, with no app or account.
Want us to handle it?
Pick the questions and add the people. We invite everyone, remind them, and edit the film, with a printed book if you want one. Free until your trailer is ready. Then choose Film ($49) or Film + Book ($109).
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